Why do you do what you do?
There are two consistent questions I get nearly every week about my work and the Foundation. How can you work day in and day out with abused children, broken and suffering families and the constant personal attacks that come from your work? And, secondly, why do you do it?
Recently, I have been very ill and it has been hard both physically and emotionally to keep it going, but with every call for help, there seems to be a small burst of energy to keep responding. Where this comes from and the answers to the questions above are what I want to “Blog” about today. Since this is very personal I would ask that your response be directed towards me and not the Foundation. There are, of course, many people that keep the entire ship going and even though the Foundation has my name on it, I am not the Foundation nor is the Foundation me.
With the advantage of many years of hindsight to refer to, I can tell you that although I have had many choices to make, paths to pick and one heck of a lot of plain old hard times it all seemed to end up here. I have discovered that while we all make choices that create our future, looking back with enough years, it makes sense. It is almost as if it is pre-ordained. Destiny, some call it, but I prefer to call it directed choices.
Those of you, who know me personally, know my childhood was steeped in religion. As with many who have such beginnings I could not reconcile what I was being taught and the overwhelming amount of suffering I personally experienced and saw in the world around me. This set me on a quest, not in any way defined or even clearly identified, to find a truth, a path, a way, a religion or philosophy to understand the suffering and quite frankly reduce some of my own.
A better job, more children, more money, a different church, no church at all, a new philosophy, even more college degrees only brought a new set of circumstances which brought its own new version of fear and suffering. Life for the most part just became more complex and every day a new challenge which became a life of struggle to survive not the life of peace and joy that was promised. I could not accept nor would I accept that I would have to spend my life here on earth suffering so that in a later life I would find that promised peace. It had to be here also.
What I have discovered is perhaps overly simple, but it goes like this. We are very human, meaning we really do not know too much about life at a very profound level. We make decisions every minute of every day that creates the actions and reactions of life to respond. In the midst of this dance it is very hard and often impossible to make sense of any of it, but with the benefit of years, a pattern will emerge that will show you that you are exactly where you should be for that given point in your life. Life is constantly changing and so is each of us. Everything in life is temporary. The hottest neighborhood, the greatest car, the downright best new job… none of it lasts. What lasts is you poised to make another decision which will lead to another reaction of life which makes another choice and on and on it will flow.
What emerges towards the end is a pattern which, if you calm down and look at it with a quite mind, makes sense. All along you were presented with choices. Each decision you made presented another choice which brought you to today. Alive with the chance to make life better by another choice. But, rest assured, and this I know is true. You will find that for every choice you make for the “ME” and not for the benefit of another will reap an unwanted result. A choice made for others will reap another chance to help others and life begins to make sense.
No, I’m not recommending you give up everything, take a vow of suffering and poverty. Far from it. My experience those who do quickly find themselves on the receiving end of helping not the delivery end. Enjoy what you do and surely enjoy what you have every day. I’m just recommending to stop on your journey from time to time and help someone who is struggling on his or her path. It will help you more that you think.
We all live by Grace and that Grace is our destiny. The choices we make determines our peace and if you’re very lucky you will be given the chance to help someone every day of your life. I have found that Grace. Every day I get to use what limited skills I have to reduce the suffering in another life and at the end of the day I find that promised peace.
It wasn’t in a book, not in a better job, more money or even in a new relationship. It was there every day in my life. Choose to reduce the suffering in someone else, your suffering will be lifted and you will find a life of Grace. That is the answer to your questions. I do what I do because that is what I do… by choice.
Recently, I have been very ill and it has been hard both physically and emotionally to keep it going, but with every call for help, there seems to be a small burst of energy to keep responding. Where this comes from and the answers to the questions above are what I want to “Blog” about today. Since this is very personal I would ask that your response be directed towards me and not the Foundation. There are, of course, many people that keep the entire ship going and even though the Foundation has my name on it, I am not the Foundation nor is the Foundation me.
With the advantage of many years of hindsight to refer to, I can tell you that although I have had many choices to make, paths to pick and one heck of a lot of plain old hard times it all seemed to end up here. I have discovered that while we all make choices that create our future, looking back with enough years, it makes sense. It is almost as if it is pre-ordained. Destiny, some call it, but I prefer to call it directed choices.
Those of you, who know me personally, know my childhood was steeped in religion. As with many who have such beginnings I could not reconcile what I was being taught and the overwhelming amount of suffering I personally experienced and saw in the world around me. This set me on a quest, not in any way defined or even clearly identified, to find a truth, a path, a way, a religion or philosophy to understand the suffering and quite frankly reduce some of my own.
A better job, more children, more money, a different church, no church at all, a new philosophy, even more college degrees only brought a new set of circumstances which brought its own new version of fear and suffering. Life for the most part just became more complex and every day a new challenge which became a life of struggle to survive not the life of peace and joy that was promised. I could not accept nor would I accept that I would have to spend my life here on earth suffering so that in a later life I would find that promised peace. It had to be here also.
What I have discovered is perhaps overly simple, but it goes like this. We are very human, meaning we really do not know too much about life at a very profound level. We make decisions every minute of every day that creates the actions and reactions of life to respond. In the midst of this dance it is very hard and often impossible to make sense of any of it, but with the benefit of years, a pattern will emerge that will show you that you are exactly where you should be for that given point in your life. Life is constantly changing and so is each of us. Everything in life is temporary. The hottest neighborhood, the greatest car, the downright best new job… none of it lasts. What lasts is you poised to make another decision which will lead to another reaction of life which makes another choice and on and on it will flow.
What emerges towards the end is a pattern which, if you calm down and look at it with a quite mind, makes sense. All along you were presented with choices. Each decision you made presented another choice which brought you to today. Alive with the chance to make life better by another choice. But, rest assured, and this I know is true. You will find that for every choice you make for the “ME” and not for the benefit of another will reap an unwanted result. A choice made for others will reap another chance to help others and life begins to make sense.
No, I’m not recommending you give up everything, take a vow of suffering and poverty. Far from it. My experience those who do quickly find themselves on the receiving end of helping not the delivery end. Enjoy what you do and surely enjoy what you have every day. I’m just recommending to stop on your journey from time to time and help someone who is struggling on his or her path. It will help you more that you think.
We all live by Grace and that Grace is our destiny. The choices we make determines our peace and if you’re very lucky you will be given the chance to help someone every day of your life. I have found that Grace. Every day I get to use what limited skills I have to reduce the suffering in another life and at the end of the day I find that promised peace.
It wasn’t in a book, not in a better job, more money or even in a new relationship. It was there every day in my life. Choose to reduce the suffering in someone else, your suffering will be lifted and you will find a life of Grace. That is the answer to your questions. I do what I do because that is what I do… by choice.
posted by The Merlin Foundation | 9:59 AM
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